A Letter to God-Sized Dreamers

Last Tuesday,  I was supposed to publish a letter.   Here is Holley's assignment:  Last week your "do what you can"step for your God-sized dream was to write a post entitled "A Letter to the God-sized Dreamers" telling your sisters why what they're doing and who they're becoming through this process is worth it even on the hard days.  However, I had a problem:  I was feeling sick, tired, and depressed.  I didn't even want to read the other blog posts.  Have you ever felt like all you want to do is hide your head under a blanket, because you are even sick of yourself?  Ugh!

I was in a bad spot, ignoring my letter-writing, because I didn't think there was any way I could possibly write a letter to my sisters when I wasn't measuring up to my own expectations.  However, the good thing, about being in a hard place in your life, is that it forces you to pray.  And God has answered my prayers in unexpected ways this week.  So here it goes, my letter to you.

Dear Sisters, 

Did any of you expect the process of following your God-sized dream to be easy?  I think sometimes we feel like it will be easy;  because in our excitement over the initial dedication to obeying God, we are thinking of the end results and not seeing the whole picture.  However, any of us, that have followed other God-sized dreams, know it is not that simple.  

Don't feel bad if you were feeling idealistic and excited, but you were disappointed when life hit you with some unexpected curves.  They happen:  such is life.  Even at the ripe age of 60, I get that same expectancy when I am planning something new, especially when I am convinced it is a God-thing.    

As I sat here writing you, I began to think of one of the biggest God-sized dreams I have ever embarked upon.  If you guessed marriage, you are right.  This June, my husband and I will celebrate our 42nd wedding anniversary.  I was 19, and he was 21.  We knew the Lord, and he was called to the music ministry.  Wow!  What an adventure!  I had never lived away from home, because I wanted to go to university in our town.  A week after we married we moved to New Orleans, so he could go to seminary.  That was a summer of mixed emotions:  from the high of the honeymoon to the low of being terribly homesick.  And that was only the beginning.

However, the important thing here is our God-sized dream, which was the consecration of our lives and marriage to God.  You see, we really believed in those vows we took, and I think the only one we haven't dealt with is "until death do us part."  God has blessed me with a wonderful, godly husband.  In fact, one of my young prayers was for him to be the spiritual leader of our household;  and, he is. 

I think you will find that God gives you different God-sized dreams at different stages of your life.  If you read the post prior to this one, you will see that I had to trim mine a little.

I hope this gives you some encouragement, that it is worth it -- even when your path gets rocky and hard -- to follow your God-sized dream.  Life doesn't always give us what we expect.  I did not expect to have a chronic illness that is difficult to manage;  however, God has used this to grow me in directions I did not plan.  Also, God was there even when I doubted my own dedication to Him.  He was there when I felt like I could not stand another moment of pain, fatigue, and depression.  He was there when our son and son-in-law died, when 3 of our parents passed.  God has been there every step of the way.  

God gave me back my dreams, when I thought there was no use in even asking for a God-sized dream.  Also, he has showed me I do not always have to take large steps to get there.  When I fall, He picks me up again, just like I would help my own child rise.

Yes, it is worth it God-sized dreamer.  It takes fire to refine gold.  And that is you:  you are a nugget of unrefined gold.  You are God's child.

Now unto him that is able to keep you from falling, and to present you faultless before the presence of his glory with exceeding joy, to the only wise
God our Saviour, be glory and majesty, dominion and power, both now and ever.  Amen  (KJV, Jude 1:24-25)

Lovingly, from your sister in Christ,

Deborah





P.S  Not Failure, But Discovery -- that is part of what a God-sized dream is about.